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Friday, March 18, 2016

Why I Can't Just Throw My Hair in a Top Knot
and Deal With It

"I don't feel bad enough about myself to think I can't do it on my


Funny how the truth you've been holding back behind your red-painted lips comes out like water breaking from behind a cracking dam from time-to-time.

Those words tumbled from my mouth about a week ago; I was sitting at a table full of some of my closest, brightest friends. We sip tea together about once a week for a Bible study. (Which, as we all know, is code for eat chocolate-chip cookies, and occasionally talk about scripture.)

On the roster for the night was grace. Specifically, the grace that comes with being unable to do it all. We're going through the She Speaks Truth study on gratitude. The two-week study takes you through Psalms - the ones about putting a new song in your mouth, humility, gracefulness.

All things new. All things so many of us fail to encompass on a daily


But we forget, don't we? We enter our weeks with strong wills, stronger coffee a furrowed brow and a pioneer spirit. We tackle our to-do lists like some Biblical hero, ready to sling our determined stones at our Goliath to-do lists.


Church play?

Host a dinner?

Take on additional responsibilities at work?

Pay off debt?

Get oil changed?

Eliminate gluten?

Run a half-marathon?

Text back the friend battling loneliness?

We got this.

And then we wonder why at the end of the week – or somewhere in the middle, in traffic, with our friends, with our coworkers – the delicate threads lacing our kindness, our patience together snap.

We wonder why our grainy Christlike characteristics topple over like tiny castles we've built into the sand.

In a society laced with Pins and Instagram photos that tell us to throw our hair into a top knot, crank up gangster rap and deal with it, can we really be that surprised? We're being conditioned to think not only that we can do everything on our own, but that we should.

We're not conditioned to boast in our weaknesses. Or to sing praises for the One who covers them all.

There's room for hustle. For hard work. And for the love of God, there's room for top knots.

(The higher the hair, the closer to God, after all.)

But there's no room for growth when we're determined to do it on our own. When we let our pride and determination clog the arteries that make us new.

photo credit: delicate +1 in comments (tagged). via photopin (license)

photo credit: WidWRg via photopin (license)
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