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Saturday, April 24, 2010

walking, stumbling

"When the world is falling out from under me, I'll be found in you still standing. When the sky rolls up and mountains fall on their knees, when time and space are through, I'll be found in you."
-Brooke Fraser, Shadow Feet

I never really realize how much I've missed home, until I'm here.  There is something so beautiful about Mechanicsville in the rain.  The trees and the grass that surrounds my house are an illuminating emerald.  The smell of the coming rain is overwhelming, everything is so peaceful, so tranquil. 

And though my life is about to be turned completely up-side-down with graduation in 14 days, I am not worried or stressed or even tired.  I'm ready. 

According to...everyone...the world should be falling out from under me.  They slam my subconsious with questions: What are you going to do? What are you going to do? What are you going to do? As if what I'm going to do is my only definition. 

The definition of myself lies in more than just my post-graduate choice of verb.  Write, report, edit, travel, sing, marry.  These words are (hopefully) what I'm going to do.  But, they're not who I am.  I'm looking for people who ask who I am. 

Here is my definition, the thing that I long to have known about me.  The thing I want people to ask me about.

I am the beloved daughter of the King.
I have been made new.

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