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Saturday, March 27, 2010

for such a time as this

"And if I perish, I perish."
-Esther 4:16

It finally happened. Flip flop weather. I love flip flops because they're like old friends. Wearing them is like riding a bicycle: you always feel comfortable in them, no matter how long it has been since you've worn them. No matter what kind of day I'm having, it always puts a smile on my face to hear the little foamy click, clack, click, clack following behind me wherever I go.

At James Madison University, the male population (a sad forty percent of the student body --- bad for dating, good for girls night outs) look out for "preview day." The day that all the ladies escape from their sweatshirt cocoons and wear bikinis on the quad. Putting the spring in spring semester.

Now, I'm not going to say how I feel about bikinis. I'm not going to say how I feel about seeing a girl's thong when the wind blows up her already too-short skirt. I'm not going to say. I'm really hoping that I won't say accidentally. Also that you can pick up from my tone how I feel about bikinis and butt cheek exposure.

But I will say that the warm weather is putting a serious damper on my attempts to deny that I am 41 days away from college graduation. It's really hard to ignore the fact that the end of the school year is very (too) quickly approaching.

So, when the flip flops and bikinis came out last week, panic mode set in.

Side note: Just got a text from my mom that says "Go get 'em tiger!" How did she do that?! Not text, she can text all right. I mean, she uses her pointer finger to push all of the buttons, it's so cute. But, how did she know?!

Anyway, back to panic mode. I get the jitters when I think about graduation and the summer, and the possible grad school opportunity. And I get the jitters when I think about all I have to do within the next 41 days, and how quickly they go by.

I also get the jitters when I drink too much coffee. I'm on my second cup of the day. Maybe I should eat some fruit.

I've been thinking a lot about Esther lately. Lately meaning the past year and a half. After her Uncle Mordecai tells her that she is the one that must approach the King, without being summoned , to deliver the Jews from persecution. This, as we learn from the Biblical text, means certain death. Esther courageously accepts the words from Mordecai that she has come to her royal position "for such a time as this" (Esther 4:14).

The King shows her favor. In fact, he tells her everything that any woman has ever wanted to hear from a man. "Queen Esther," he says, "What is your petition? It will be given you. What is your request? Even up to half the kingdom, it will be granted" (Esther 7:2).

I've fallen in love with this story. It may seem overly romantic, but I can't help it. He loves her so much. She loves her people and trusts God so much. Every morning when the light slips through the cracks of my of my window in my cluttered college apartment, I pray that my life looks the same way.

I pray that I have the courage to approach the post-graduation world with as much vigor as Esther approached the throne of her lover. God knows me, and loves me. Loves me like Xerxes loved Esther. He shows me mercy and wants the best for His daughter.

When I walk across that platform on May 8th, 2010 in my purple gown and gold shoes I will have my head held high and my shoulders back. Courageously accepting my diploma, and my testimony. Because I am leaving this university and entering the "real world" (if there really such a thing) for such a time as this.

Now, if I could just wake up and get there with minimal stress, that would be great.

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